Saturday, March 25, 2006

Judging a Book by Its Cover

(Warning: This is just my opinion regarding a topic that is important to me so I apologize in advance for the little soap box rant. Please feel free to share your own opinions and thoughts.)

Whether you are male or female, wealthy or just making ends meet, black or white, overweight or underweight, short or tall...someone in a crowd, at a party, in your office has probably already developed an opinion about you without really getting to know you. If you have NEVER had that misfortune then you are lucky!

I think some of the most powerful words that I have ever heard were spoken by Dr. Martin Luther King; "I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

Sadly, we are no where near that day and sadly people’s prejudices, perceptions and even sometimes ignorance stand in the way of us being a kinder, gentler world -- one where a man or woman is truly seen and embraced for their character (the person they are) and not because of the $250 pair of shoes that they wear or don’t wear.

I am a firm believer that people are not born with a prejudicial eye. This is something that is taught (even inadvertently) or gained through the influence of others. If everyone, everywhere made a deliberate effort not to pre-judge a person based on appearance, but rather took the time to get to know someone…what a more loving, productive, and open-minded world this would be.


What do you think?

Posted by Pam at 2:50:24 PM in Pam's Ponderings (32) | Permalink | Comments (5)

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Can YOU Come Out and Play?

When was the last time you caught a snowflake on your tongue or let snowflakes coat your eyelashes? Sound like fun?

It is!

Last weekend I was up at my favorite coffee house when it began to snow and snow hard. It was an amazing and welcomed event...until last weekend we had not seen any sign of moisture for 143 days and where I live in Arizona, snow is rare.

Not only was the snow a beautiful sight to see, but what was even more beautiful was watching 30 adults (myself included) darting in and out of the snow…catching snowflakes on our tongues and on our eyelashes, giggling and laughing like little children. The result was energizing and uplifting!!

It was then that I was reminded of how important it is to stay in touch with our child sides. (You know the part of each if us that loves to do silly things and enjoys being playful.) We all have the capability to be child-like and it is more than OK to embrace that side of yourself, letting it come out and play. Heck, it is what keeps us young and helps us to recharge our batteries.

So, can you come out and play?

I challenge you to…

have a snowball fight or make a snow angel (if you have snow)…
turn some cartwheels…
sit on the floor and play jacks…
skip down the sidewalk…
jump rope…
sing and dance in the middle of your living room…
spin in circles until you get dizzy

Whatever you choose to do, have fun, re-energize, because you deserve it!! Oh, and one more thing, try and make a play date with yourself on a regular basis. I promise you, you will be glad you did.

Until next time, be well and have fun…

Pam

Posted by Pam at 9:54:03 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (4)

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Sexual Harassment is Never OK

I wanted to share a that a Make the Most of U subscriber sent to me (thank you, Susan!). While I know the worthwhile event this was holding has come and gone, the problem still exists and support is needed.

Sexual harassment is never OK, prank or not! Help take a stand and raise awareness because sexual harassment is a global issue.

Posted by Pam at 1:06:54 PM in Pam's Ponderings (32) | Permalink | Comments (0)

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

"The Diet of Truth"

A very dear is doing some amazing work around the issue of weight loss. I have had chance to witness some of her inspiring work and wish to share this FREE resource with you.

From website:

Do you wish you could let go of the overweight story?

Does the word "diet" make you want to cry?

Do you dream that, one day, Prince Charming will kiss you, and wake you up from the nightmare of trying so hard and never succeeding to permanently lose weight?

Are you ready for a tasted, I mean "tested", and different approach that will set you free?

If so, this magical movie is here to inspire you in taking yourself "lightly" and fly, free of the weight of shame, free of the weight of blame, free from dieting, free to live YOUR dream!

(Thank you, Mahalene for sharing!)

Posted by Pam at 5:12:29 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (0)

Saturday, March 04, 2006

What the Heck Is Coaching Anyway?

I know this may sound silly, but for the longest time I have been side-stepping posting an entry about coaching. Why? Not because I am ashamed of coaching or embarrassed to say that I am a … quite to the contrary!!

Coaching is an amazing profession and I really love what I do. My reasoning…because I was fearful that the entry would appear a “shameless plug” on a site that’s purpose is to support and motivate others.

Never did it occur to me that by sharing a bit about coaching it might actually also provide support and motivation. It was not until recently when I received an e-mail from a reader (asking what coaching is) that the light bulb went on and I realized how important it is to share…

Imagine having a safe and comfortable space to share your dreams, goals, thoughts, worries, and obstacles. Then imagine having someone focus solely on YOU; where you are in your life and where you wish to be…supporting YOU in finding the means to get from where you are to where you wish to be. Sound good?

Coaching Is…

- A process of personal growth and discovery
- A collaborative and supportive partnership that helps you to overcome obstacles and accomplish goals
- A confidential, honest, trusting, and safe relationship
- A catalyst in developing strategies for forward movement
- All about YOU and never about the coach

Coaching Is Not…

- Therapy
- Consulting
- Critical or judgmental

A Coach …

- Holds you accountable
- Listens to you fully
- Asks you powerful questions
- Empowers you to move forward
- Helps you knock down walls and remove any obstacles that are standing in your way.
- Develops a roadmap with you so that you can get from where you are to where you wish to be.

In my personal and humble opinion, is amazing...not just as a process, but as a career. It has changed lives and it has certainly changed mine.

If you or someone you know has a question about coaching, please feel free to post right here or e-mail me.

Until next time, please be well…

Pam

Posted by Pam at 3:01:36 PM in Pam's Ponderings (32) | Permalink | Comments (2)

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Yes You Can!

What people say you cannot do, you try and find that you can. - Henry David Thoreau

Has there ever been a time when you really wanted to do something, but you stopped yourself because others told you it was not possible? If you answered “yes”, please consider these questions…What was the worst thing that could have happened if you had tried? OR What could you have possibly lost by trying?

In all actuality, you have more to gain by trying then you do by not trying. Think about it.

Posted by Pam at 5:00:16 PM in Quotes with Impact (30) | Permalink | Comments (2)

Saturday, February 18, 2006

The Power of Beliefs

This past week I was up at my favorite coffee house taking a bit of a break and grabbing a cup of coffee. One of my favorite regulars was there, a 77- year-old artist who has worlds of experience and amazing spirit. To make a long story short, we got to talking about all the diverse things he has done in his life. Let me tell you, his experience is astounding… he has taken on projects in different fields that many would shy away from because of the sheer magnitude.

From his stories about his experiences one thing was perfectly clear…he never worried about how  (or if ) he was going to get a job done. He would tell you that the reason was because he believed, he believed in himself and his ability to make things happen. Listening to him was awe-inspiring!

Earlier in the week a shared some amazing insight regarding beliefs, as we were discussing limiting beliefs. To paraphrase what she shared…beliefs all have a pay off attached to them, and that pay off can be either negative or positive. If they did not have a pay off, we would not hang on to them.

The two discussions encouraged me to take a look at my own beliefs, especially the limiting ones. They made me realize just how powerful beliefs are and what a large role they play in what we do.

So for this week, my wish for you is to take a look at your beliefs, especially the ones that may be limiting, (i.e. the “I could never do that, because I do not have…” beliefs). To help you do so, on a piece of paper draw a line down the middle and at the top of one column write, “Positive Beliefs” and for the other column write, “Negative/Limiting Beliefs”. Then begin to list all the beliefs that serve you positively and all the beliefs that may hold you back. Just free write and do not edit yourself. There is NO right or wrong in this exercise.

After listing all your beliefs take a look at the positive beliefs. How do those make you feel when reading them? Do they make you feel empowered? Proud?

Now take a look at the negative/limiting beliefs. How do those beliefs make you feel? Do you feel scared? Frustrated? Ashamed?

Then take out another piece of paper and pick one or two limiting beliefs and re-write them with a positive slant, one that evokes the feelings you experienced when you read your positive belief list. Once you have done that, think of no less than three actions that you can do that will help you to fully utilize and validate that new belief. (Thank you,   for the powerful suggestion.)

 

Give it a whirl. You have nothing to lose (with the exception of some limiting beliefs ::::grin::::) and everything to gain.

 

Until next time, please be well…

Pam

Posted by Pam at 6:43:57 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (2)

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Intention vs. Goal…What’s the Difference?

This is a discussion and topic that has been coming up a lot lately…at least it seems that way anyway. So what’s the difference between an intention and a goal? Aren’t they one in the same?

Not really, but they are related and intertwined with one another. I like to think of an intention as the bigger picture…the whole enchilada, if you will. With measurable goals as the filling of that enchilada (keeping with the analogy <g>) that makes that enchilada complete. Basically, with every intention there are goals that serve as our stepping stones to fulfilling that intention.

Let me give you a personal example…

My intention is to help change the world in a positive way one person at a time. Some of my goals to achieving that intention are:

 

1) Reaching out to as many people as I can as often as I can.
2) Continuing to build a loving and supportive coaching practice.
3) Broadening my knowledge and experience.


Now, comes the really fun part, creating measurable action items for each goal… the things that I can and will do in order to accomplish my goals. Let’s take #3 as an example… in order to achieve this goal (which is one that is continuous) I entered into a Masters program, I am continuing to expand my coach training, hired my own coach, I read all sorts of books, as well as listen and learn from others. I am always seeking opportunities to enhance and improve my coaching skills, which in turn helps me with goals 1 & 2.

If this sounds like a lot of work, I won’t lie…it is, but I have truly found that anything that is REALLY worth it is worth all the work and effort…especially when it comes to intentions.

So, what are some of your intentions and the goals you will use to fulfill those intentions? Please feel free to share them here. If you get stuck and need some support, don’t hesitate to reach out, as I am happy to help.

Until next time, please be well…

Pam

Posted by Pam at 1:54:34 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (0)

Saturday, February 04, 2006

The Desire to Know

When I started this blog last June, it was my intention to share not only some coaching tips, but some thoughts, quotes, and even personal stories to help others move forward. You see, I truly do enjoy seeing people experience those “aha moments”…moments when they realize that many of the answers they’ve sought have been inside of them waiting to come out.

With that said, it is my desire to really reach out to the wonderful people that read this blog. I want to know about the desires and aspirations you have and I also want to know of any obstacles or challenges that may be standing in your way. This blog truly is for you, so I wish to cover the things that matter most to you.

Now I turn to you… what can we work on together right here to help you move forward? Please share your thoughts in the comment section or feel free to e-mail me. I will do my utmost to share some thoughts here that will address the issues and the obstacles.

I look forward to hearing from you and supporting you in your endeavors. Until next time, please remember that there is NOTHING you can’t do.

Be well…

Pam

Posted by Pam at 4:08:59 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (2)

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Who Turned Off the Power?

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent - Eleanor Roosevelt

Of all the quotes that I love and have shared, this is the one that is the most powerful for me. It is taped on my computer screen at eye level where I can be reminded of it regularly. It is also on the back of my business cards.

It is true that no one has the right to make us feel powerless or less of a person. NO ONE! And while it is a bitter pill to sometimes swallow, we do have a say/choice in how someone makes us feel.

OK, then why is it so easy to feel inferior or powerless?

There are many reasons…

Maybe someone we loved put us down and because we loved them, we believed them. (Hey, people we love and/or love us know us best, right? NOT ALWAYS.)

Maybe it is because we have always been afraid to stand up for ourselves in fear we would rock the boat or make someone angry.

Maybe it is because we spend time comparing ourselves with others and wishing we had what they have.

Maybe it is because we just don’t ourselves and our abilities.

Does any of this sound familiar?

If so, please don’t despair because reclaiming your power (and I am not referring to maniacal power) is absolutely possible. Give the following a whirl and see what happens…

1) Make a list of your MANY amazing attributes. (Yes, you have many!!) You should even write down all the attributes you wish to have. At the top of the list, be sure to write the words, “I am…”

2) As you write, if your (that little contradictory voice) rears its head, thank it for its contributions and then tell it to be quiet. ;) Please be sure just to keep writing!

3) Take your list and over the next 90 days read your list to yourself five times in the morning and five times at night before bed.

Just remember, you do have the power and no one has the right to turn it off.

Posted by Pam at 2:33:43 PM in Quotes with Impact (30) | Permalink | Comments (2)

Great Resources for Stepfamilies

Today it is not uncommon for someone to have grown up with a stepfamily, remarried and gained a stepfamily, or be in the process of being introduced into a stepfamily. It’s not always an easy transition, but it is certainly one that does not have to be handled alone.

A friend and colleague of mine is offering a FREE introductory teleclass, 3 BEST-KEPT SECRETS TO CREATING A SUCCESSFUL STEPFAMILY and I wanted to share the information incase you or someone you know may be able to benefit. (Thank you, .)

From Sue’s “Stepfamilies That Work e-Newsletter”…

Is your stepfamily struggling? Are you worried that things will never settle down in your stepfamily and become ‘normal’?

Very few couples realize the enormous, often overwhelming, challenges they will face when they decide to enter into a stepfamily relationship. For this reason, second marriages break up at an alarming rate of 66% each year, according to The Stepfamily Foundation in New York.

Being in a stepfamily is tough. However, once you have the proper tools and know the guidelines – how to manage a stepfamily and the roles of each family member – the new stepfamily system can and does work.

Join Sue Rasmussen and Aileen Braun DeAugustine, both stepfamily coaches and stepmoms, as they lead you through this content-rich, powerful, one-hour teleclass. This session is an introduction to their proven, time-tested stepfamily success program series.

Teleclasses fill quickly, so don’t wait to register.

For more information or to register for this free teleclass “3 BEST-KEPT SECRETS TO CREATING A SUCCESSFUL STEPFAMILY please visit .

Posted by Pam at 1:44:27 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (0)

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Celebrating YOU!

I celebrate myself, and sing myself. - Walt Whitman

You know, I could not have said it better than Walt Whitman and sadly, many of us do not take the time to celebrate and sing ourselves. How come?

Oftentimes we are too busy, or we have been told that to celebrate ourselves is boastful and bragging…maybe it just comes down to the feelings that we do not deserve to celebrate ourselves and what we do.

I want to tell you, celebrating you, celebrating all that you do, celebrating your accomplishments is important. It’s an important part of growth, it’s an important part of change, and it’s an important of achievement.

This is my challenge to you, if you choose to accept it…

The next time you accomplish a goal or even a step towards the end result of a goal, celebrate!

Heck, the celebration does not even have to be attached to a goal or end result of something; just take some time to celebrate you and all the wonderful things you bring to the table. Oh, and the nice thing, celebrating does not have to cost money, it does not have to take up too much time…

It can be a letter of congratulations written to yourself, a book that you have always wanted, a long soak in the tub…whatever strikes your fancy...just please do not let another moment go by without celebrating.

Posted by Pam at 2:31:05 PM in Quotes with Impact (30) | Permalink | Comments (4)

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Is it Déjà Vu?

Have you ever had an issue or situation reoccur time and time again which left you asking, “OK, when will this go away?” OR “Why me?”

Yes, why you? Great question!

The answer; oftentimes repetitive issues and situations present themselves until we learn to master them. It is usually the Universe’s way of telling us we have something to learn and we need to pay close attention.

As a personal example…

For as long as I could remember I was always fixing, rescuing, making things right for everyone around me. Partly because I never wanted to let anyone down and partly because I had this need to be liked. Needless to say, I encountered people (repeatedly) who would take advantage and walk all over of me, leaving me feeling angry and powerless.

It was not until I learned that I didn’t have to make things right for everyone in order to be liked… the only person I was really letting down was me… I could help empower people to make things right for themselves…(OK, you get the idea)…that the situation of always fixing, getting walked on and feeling angry and powerless dissipated.

I learned that it was OK to draw . And guess what? No one disliked me for it. As a matter of fact, my boundaries and my feelings were respected much more.

So here is a challenge for you...

The next time you are up against a situation that you wish would change or stop, take some time to consider the following:

1) What it is about the situation that bothers you.
2) How you feel every time the situation occurs.
3) What you can do differently to handle the situation (differently from the past times).

Use the situation as a learning experience and find a way to master it. By doing so you will help eradicate or change it. As always, if you have any questions or wish to share, you are welcome to do so right here or feel free to contact me directly.

Until next time, please be well…

Pam

Posted by Pam at 2:20:15 PM in Creating Change (86) | Permalink | Comments (7)

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Define Success

Since the inception of Make the Most of U we have touched on but nothing seems to define it more succinctly (for me, anyway) then the following poem by Ralph Waldo Emerson….

Success

To laugh often and too much
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends
To appreciate beauty
To find the best in others
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition
To know even one life has breathed easier because you lived.
This is to have succeeded.

Think about it.

(Thank you, for the wonderful reminder.)

Posted by Pam at 2:16:14 PM in Quotes with Impact (30) | Permalink | Comments (4)